The above is both constitutional and great advice. Reverend Don Wildmon once told me (Bryan) that I needed to be less outspoken. Wow, that from Brother Don, one of the most outspoken men I know!

I wish I had taken his advice more to heart, for some of my problems with the Indiana bar have to due with me being too forthright, too open, too honest and too ready to speak out about perceived injustices in an unconventional manner. More on that later . . . Right now suffice it to say that as this year closes out I have failed to achieve the major objective of the ArchAngel Michael Division. (Set forth in tile above).

This failure must have a consequence. More on that tomorrow.

My problems with the Indiana bar started way back in 1996, and i wrongly thought the many years that had come and gone since then would ameliorate their concerns about my pro-life activist past. It did not.

The first question put to me out of the box during my January 25, 2008 (my birthday) meeting with the full bar entrance committee was why I never paid the $61,616 to the abortion clinic operators. (See this post for background as well as this one and this one, too.) The second question was how Kansas, Montana and Missouri could have ever agreed to license me given my number of arrests (for pro-life activism) and lawsuits (filed by the abortion industry). Their third concern had to due with my sense of justice, my passion to shout out when I see wrong being done and my readiness to communicate too much, too frequently in too unconventional a manner. More on that later as well.

One of the many counselors the Indiana bar mandated me to see recently told me that I had caused a lot of trouble back in the 80’s and early 90’s and it had not been forgotten. That really struck me as ironic, for pro-life leaders had told me just the opposite — that I had been gone a long time from the Fort and that few remembered my pro-life efforts in the Fort in the late 80’s and early 90’s!

How I wish those two wires were crossed! Alas, the bar has a long memory.

I had been sent to an Indiana judge to start the process of reviewing my moral character and mental fitness way back in the Fall of 2007, now more than 14 months ago. That was in response to my filing a full six months before that. The bar had been slow to process my file, and I was twisting in the wind after a brutal political horsewhippin’ in Kansas during that time. (Click here for just a small taste of that …note the comments, some are quite enlightening … and click here for the coup de grace on my legal resume in Kansas .) Oh, and check this out for my heroic wife’s take on the whole thing while her man was being publicly flogged. We have fought the fight.

The Indiana judge that I was finally slated to see (14 months ago) regarding my Indiana admission to practice law told me that she viewed me as the guy who would step out of a crowd and engage the police when they were involved in apparent wrongdoing. She told me that she was not that kind of person and that most people just were not like me.

I had, in fact, done just that more than once. Most notably to rescue an 83 year old pro-life grandma who was being wrongly and roughly arrested. I may have saved her life. It cost me 68 days of federal incarceration. I have written on that elsewhere. Right here, for example.

The Indiana judge (Allen County) who met with me more than a year ago wondered aloud if my zeal and passion would cause me to put my religious goals above the law. She stated her concern that I could, for example, justify embezzlement in order to advance a legitimate ministry like Matthew 25 Clinic. She feared, in other words, that my “higher laws” ethic could cause me problems as an Indiana attorney.

I assured her that they would not, and that the 10 Commandments were safe around me. My higher laws are that of MLK, not Robin Hood or Jesse James, I assured her.

But it was not the Big 10 she was really worried about, me thinks. It was all the lesser laws. Laws such as those that many of us break each and every week. Laws such as those discussed on the video clip that closes this post.

And so I close with some great legal advice from one of my favorite law school professors. The clip is long but most interesting and pertinent to all who are the kind, like me, that are likely to have some issues with the authorities at one time or another. (Does that render me unfit to be an attorney?) As the former police officer on the video says, “people are inherently honest …. and that can be their biggest downfall …. or they just want to tell their story.” I guess I am somewhere on that scale, that that probably explains much of my present legal problems with the Indiana authorities. I tell my story, that that tends to get me into more trouble.  Especially when hunting season extends far beyond the alleged cessation of hostilities.   Click here for an example of the one who defeated Kline extended the flogging well into the Spring of 2007!  Such hostilites continued until he was disgraced and driven from office in sex scandal. (But not before he hit a few more good licks on me.)  Shakespeare ain’t got nothing on Kansas!

Please click here to spend some time with the best professor I ever sat under, Professor James Duane of Regent University School of Law ….. http://www.wimp.com/coprule/

You should especially watch this if the spectre of Obama’s appointments cause you concern, if you homeschool, if you homebirth, if you take your Faith so serious as to question the law with it, if you are an activist, if you are the kind of person who speaks up when government agents seem to violate the very laws that they are sworn to uphold. If any of the following apply to you, then this schooling is needed in this hour. Click it and heed it.

Just as we promised in this link, we have a new brochure for our ArchAngel Raphael Division.  Click on the blue link at the end of this article to print it.

Here is a great suggestion: Print the new brochure in color, go to our vault (see the previous post) and print those in color, get copies made, and make a pro-life presentation about the ArchAngel Institute at your church, synagogue or Moose Lodge in January.

post-abortion-brochure

Oh, we will post another new brochure on our prayer services soon, so watch for that.

Here is the key to our vault … where our best brochures are stored.

The tiles above and this link contain other significant introductions.

Regent — One who rules during the absence of a monarch.

Anne and I have spent much time on the question of a name, as we always do.

Here is some background . . .

My grandfather, Richard Brown, in the year that he died, asked that I name a son after his great grandfather. And thus we have Ignatius John, named after Ignatius Brown (1781-1820) and his grandfathers John Walker and John Brown. Our second born is Isaac William, named after one of the patriarchs of our Faith, named for our great joy, and named after the delivering doctor (Dr. Williams – a difficult delivery) and William Browne, who came to America in 1634 as a 13 year old indentured servant on Lord Baltimore’s Ark and the Dove expedition. And we have Gabriel Thomas, our third son, named after a very important Angel, named after the father of William Browne who sent his son on an expedition to a new world to escape the anti-Catholicism of England at that time. Named Thomas after the great saint Thomas More, who helped inspire me to join the Catholic church, reversing a decision made by my ancestors at the time of the Revolutionary War. And we have our little Elizabeth Anne, which was the easy choice in names. I asked my beautiful and faith-filled wife, Anne Elizabeth, if we could honor her and her parents through Elizabeth Anne. The name certainly points directly toward one of the greatest moments in history — when Mary, the daughter of Anne, the daughter of Eve, freshly impregnated by the Holy Spirit, was greeted by Elizabeth, who carried John the Baptist in her womb. Elizabeth Anne also prepares our family for a possible return to the South one fine day. We could not do better than “BethAnne” down there!

And now we come to the naming of our fourth son. We appreciate the advice we have received, but already had it narrowed down to a few great choices, and so already had all the raw material prayed through.

We yet strive to honor our heritage and roots. We are struck by the desire to point all toward the Risen King of Glory. He is the Lion of the Tribe of Judah. Judah was the fourth son of Israel. Judah became, in the New Testament, Jude. Anne asked Saint Jude to pray for her during difficult hours in the birth process yesterday.

Our son’s first name is JUDAH, and his nickname shall be Jude. Call him either. We are so excited to be able to point him to such a great heritage, including the Hammer of God, Judah Maccabee ( Yehudah HaMakabi)

We also wish to point our son toward his most honorable family history and most important North Star, and thus his middle name is CHRISTOPHER. It means “Christ bearer.” And it was the name of Anne’s father’s grandfather. Christopher Bartholomew Walker was born in 1873 and died in 1962. He and Mary Isabel Gooderl and had four children. We honor this ancestor of all five of our children.

World, we ask you to take note of the birth of our fifth child: JUDAH CHRISTOPHER BROWN

Date of birth 12/27/2008 @ 19:06 hours

Weight after nursing for an hour: 8 pounds, 14 ounces

Length 22 inches

Head circumference: 14.5 inches

Anne’s biggest baby!

Name: tbd

Status: healthy, alert, perfectly formed, suckling

Dad’s thoughts at birth:

First, praise be to God!

Second, lack of health insurance is becoming common in our country. Too many employers, like Walmart, offer few employees coverage. Too many employers that once covered their employees are going belly up due to unrestrained foreign competition — a lack of resolve on the part of our elected officials to protect our national interests.

Those without health insurance may decide that having babies is too expensive. Indeed, a routine delivery at a hospital can cost $10,000. A complicated delivery many, many times more than that. C-sections are becoming quite popular, and they can easily cost twice as much as a routine vaginal birth. (See my previous thoughts on the professionalization, even industrialization, of the birth process.)

Why not consider home delivery if you are uninsured. We did. It was our third such delivery outside of a hospital setting. Two were at a birth center, with insurance. (The insurance companies probably love us) This one was at home, on our own dime.

The out of pocket costs

for the uninsured Brown family? $3000.

You can afford to have a baby. They are well worth that much!

Here are great resources for such an alternative approach to health care delivery:

Janis Chrissikos, RN (click to go to Janis’website)

Laura Gilbert, certified midwife (click to go)

Anne and Bryan and little not-yet-named all three recommend Janis and Laura!

Final word: We have done the forceps, we have done the chemical accelerants, we have done the c-section — all on our first two and in the hospitals. Our third and fourth at a birth center and our fifth at home were FAR AND BEYOND better experiences. The parents are in control. Make that the birther — as it should be.

As for the “give me no drugs” make it an earth birth, I (Bryan) think that Anne might be a bit crazy. But whatever she is, she is my LIONESS!!!

For those just tuning in, here are some interesting posts from days gone by …. just click on the blue to go to the post.

Here is the local National Right to Life Affiliate breaking the story that we were staring something new at the former abortion clinic.

Here is our dedication service on May 19, 2007….it got things rolling for us.

Here is a pretty good overview of what we are all about from last March

We did a series on our open house last January-February, here is the opening post.

Here is the mission statement post from that series

Here is the much longer version of our mission statement and what makes the Institute tick

Here is one of the many acts (infanticide) of the Indiana judiciary that helped to radicalize those who founded the Institute.

Here is another (allowing frivolous lawsuits to visit harm on good people) that drove many in the Fort to take up spiritual arms against the local abortion clinic.

Here is one of the three reasons that the abortion industry drove the Institute’s founder out of Fort Wayne in 1991

Here is an incarnational explanation of the Institute

Here is the kind of thinking that the Culture of Death just hates to read

Three months ago we received the blessing of a VIP (Bishop John D’Arcy)

The local newspaper took note of our year long endeavor to rebirth the former abortion clinic as a place of pro-life ministry.

Here is a really import part of our mission and a really important lady who is at the ArchAngel Institute everyday holding out hope through the Lord Jesus Christ

Here is some interesting background on Fort Wayne’s abortionist, Ulrich George Klopfer.

Here are our former Executive Director’s thoughts on a necessary new direction for the “Culture War” as he retired from 20 years in pro-life leadership.

Check out our categories at the right for more links. Many posts are placed in several categories. Don’t be shy, just jump right in. If you get lost just hit “front and center” in the upper left screen to go back to go (without $200, sorry.)

Thanks for stopping by. The tiles above reveal more on the big picture of what the ArchAngel Institute is all about. Putting the cookies on the bottom shelf, we are a band of dedicated Christians endeavoring to do ministry out of a former abortion clinic as three ArchAngels would see fit. And thereby please our Lord and Saviour.

Won’t you join us? See “aiding and abetting” for details on how you can.

Most importantly, please come to our OPEN HOUSE on January 24, 2009.

Dec 27 @ 1700 hours. Anne’s contractions are stalling out again, with dilation of 8 cm. She is exhausted but in great humor. What a lioness!!! Pray that this baby comes on out. The midwife is considering breaking the water. We are first trying some alternative birthing positions.

Dec 27 @ 1400 hours …. Contractions very strong, Anne has been on her hands and knees last two hours pushing. She slept maybe 30 minutes, been up all night. I do not know how she does it. I fell asleep – men are the weaker ones, this process convinces me of that. (At least this man is.) The doula just checked Anne .(Actually she is a monitrice, meaning a doula who is a registered nurse.) Cervix thinner, baby much lower, 6 cm dialation. Doula can feel the baby’s head. Midwife has decided to come now. My full time job is now to rub and massage Anne’s lower back. We are heading toward a crescendo.

Dec 27 @ 10 am — Anne is resting and the process seems to be stalling once again. The babe’s heartbeat remains strong and it is still moving quite a bit. Pray that Anne is able to sleep and so regain the strength that she will need to push when that time comes …. if it comes today. The doula and midwife are not positive that today is the day yet. “This sort of pattern can stop and go for quite some time.” Here is more Iona while we wait.

Dec 27 @ 7:45 am — Doula says the babe’s heartbeat still strong, all looks a-ok. Anne is still laboring away. Listening to Iona, a great Irish band that my very good friend and mentor at constititutional law, Bruce Green, turned me onto many years ago. Bruce and Deb were present for the birth of my firstborn. Wish you were both here today, Texas is so far away! Here is some Iona for all to appreciate.

Dec 27 @ 6:30 am — the doula has arrived and concluded her initial exam. The baby was face front last week (posterior position), which is not optimal and NOT pictured to the right. The baby is now face back (i.e. anterior, back against Anne’s bell button), which is much better. See picture. All of the premature labor that Anne has suffered through was the baby getting turned around. The baby was kicking up a storm last night, likely not all that excited about Anne’s body rotating him/her on his/her crown against the exit door.

Vivaldi Four Seasons is on the c.d. Same music that our firstborn came into the world to.

The doula says it still might be many hours, for Anne is only dialated at 3 or 4 cm, need to get to 10 to float our baby down the most important canal on earth.

December 27 @ 5:45 am The doula and midwife have been called. We expect the doula (birthing nurse) to arrive in the next few minutes. Anne’s contractions are heavy and frequent. We have passed the point of no return on this birth. My fifth child shall be born today.

December 26 @ 23:59 hours: Anne is laboring harder tonight than any of the previous nights. She thinks the baby will come in the next 12 hours. Please pray for us.

Bryan

December 26 is the Feast Day of St. Stephen. Like many saints, Stephen earned the title by dying for his testimony. He was killed by agents of the government while preaching the Good News about His Lord and Saviour, so that well recommends Stephen as a dissident. He was calling for a revolutionary change in the governance of God’s people and violating an injunction to so speak, and so that recommends him for our category on civil disobedience.

Thus we fulfill our mission statements in the ArchAngel Gabriel, Michael and Raphael Division by posting this 1950 year old sermon — Stephen’s last:

The attack on the new deacon, Stephen

6:8-15 – Stephen, full of grace and spiritual power, continued to perform miracles and remarkable signs among the people. However, members of a Jewish synagogue known as the Libertines, together with some from the synagogues of Cyrene and Alexandria, as well as some men from Cilicia and Asia, tried debating with Stephen, but found themselves quite unable to stand up against either his practical wisdom or the spiritual force with which he spoke. In desperation they bribed men to allege, “We have heard this man making blasphemous statements against Moses and against God.” At the same time they worked upon the feelings of the people, the elders and the scribes. Then they suddenly confronted Stephen, seized him and marched him off before the Sanhedrin. There they brought forward false witnesses to say, “This man’s speeches are one long attack against this holy place and the Law. We have heard him say that Jesus of Nazareth will destroy this place and change the customs which Moses handed down to us.” All who sat there in the Sanhedrin looked intently at Stephen, and as they looked his face appeared to them like the face of an angel.

CHAPTER 7

Stephen makes his defence from Israel’s history:

i. THE TIME OF ABRAHAM

7:1a -Then the High Priest said, “Is this statement true?”

7:1b-3 – And Stephen answered, “My brothers and my fathers, listen to me. Our glorious God appeared to our forefather Abraham while he was in Mesopotamia before he ever came to live in Haran, and said to him, ‘Get out of your country and from your relatives, and come to a land that I will show you.’

7:4-8a – That was how he came to leave the land of the Chaldeans and settle in Haran. And it was from there after his father’s death that God moved him into this very land where you are living today. Yet God gave him no part of it as an inheritance, not a foot that he could call his own, and yet promised that it should eventually belong to him and his descendants – even though at the time he had no descendant at all. And this is the way in which God spoke to him: he told him that his descendants should live as strangers in a foreign land where they would become slaves and be ill-treated for four hundred years, ‘And the nation to whom they will be in bondage I will judge,’ said God: ‘and after that they shall come out and serve me in this place.’ “Further, he gave him the agreement of circumcision, so that when Abraham became the father of Isaac he circumcised him on the eighth day.

Stephen’s defence:

ii. THE PATRIARCHS

7:8b-10 – “Isaac became the father of Jacob, and Jacob the father of the twelve patriarchs. Then the patriarchs in their jealousy of Joseph sold him as a slave into Egypt. But God was with him and saved him from all his troubles and gave him favour and wisdom in the eyes of Pharaoh the king of Egypt. Pharaoh made him governor of Egypt and put him in charge of his own entire household.

7:11-16 – “Then came the famine over all the land of Egypt and Canaan which caused great suffering, and our forefathers could find no food. But when Jacob heard that there was corn in Egypt he sent our forefathers out of their own country for the first time. It was on their second visit that Joseph was recognised by his brothers, and his ancestry became plain to Pharaoh. Then Joseph sent and invited to come and live with him his father and all his kinsmen, seventy-five people in all. So Jacob came down to Egypt and both he and our fathers ended their days there. After their deaths they were carried back into Shechem and laid in the tomb which Abraham had bought with silver from the sons of Hamor in Shechem.

7:17-19 – “But as the time drew near for the fulfilment of the promise which God had made to Abraham, our people grew more and more numerous in Egypt. Finally another king came to the Egyptian throne who knew nothing of Joseph. This man cleverly victimised our race. He treated our forefathers abominably, forcing them to expose our infant children so that the race should die out.

Stephen’s defence:

iii. GOD’S PROVIDENCE AND MOSES

7:20-22 – “It was at this very time that Moses was born. He was a child of remarkable beauty, and for three months he was brought up in his father’s house, and then when the time came for him to be abandoned Pharaoh’s daughter adopted him and brought him up as her own son. So Moses was trained in all the wisdom of the Egyptians, and became not only an excellent speaker but a man of action as well.

Moses’ first abortive attempt at rescue

7:23-29 – “Now when he was turned forty the thought came into his mind that he should go and visit his own brothers, the sons of Israel. He saw one of them being unjustly treated, went to the rescue and paid rough justice for the man who had been ill-treated by striking down the Egyptian. He fully imagined that his brothers would understand that God was using him to rescue them. But they did not understand. Indeed, on the very next day he came upon two of them who were quarrelling and urged them to make peace, saying, ‘Men, you are brothers. What good can come from your injuring each other?’ But the man who was wronging his neighbour pushed Moses aside saying, ‘Who made you a ruler and judge over us? Do you want to kill me as you killed that Egyptian yesterday?’ At that retort Moses fled and lived as an exile in the land of Midian, where he became the father of two sons.

Moses hears the voice of God

7:30-34 – “It was forty years later in the desert of Mount Sinai that an angel appeared to him in the flames of a burning bush, and the sight filled Moses with wonder. As he approached to look at it more closely the voice of the Lord spoke to him, saying, ‘I am the God of your fathers – the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.’ Then Moses trembled and was afraid to look any more. But the Lord spoke to him and said, ‘Take your sandals off your feet, for the place where you stand is holy ground. I have certainly seen the oppression of my people who are in Egypt; I have heard their groaning and have come down to deliver them. And now come, I will send you to Egypt.’

But Israel rejects Moses

7:35-37 – “So this same Moses whom they had rejected in the words, ‘Who made you a ruler and a judge?’ God sent to be both ruler and deliverer with the help of the angel who had appeared to him in the bush. This is the man who showed wonders and signs in Egypt and in the Red Sea, the man who led them out of Egypt and was their leader in the desert for forty years. He was Moses, the man who said to the sons of Israel, ‘The Lord your God will raise up for you a prophet like me from your brethren. Him you shall hear.’

7:38-40 – In that church in the desert this was the man who was the mediator between the angel who used to talk with him on Mount Sinai and our fathers. This was the man who received words, living words, which were to be given to you; and this was the man to whom our forefathers turned a deaf ear! They disregarded him, and in their hearts hankered after Egypt. They said to Aaron, ‘Make us gods to go before us; as for this Moses who brought us out of Egypt, we do not know what has become of him.’

7:41-43 – In those days they even made a calf, and offered sacrifices to their idol. They rejoiced in the work of their own hands. So God turned away from them and left them to worship the Host of Heaven, as it is written in the book of the prophets, ‘Did you offer me slaughtered animals and sacrifices during forty years in the wilderness, O house of Israel? Yes, you took up the tabernacle of Moloch, and the star of your god Remphan, images which you made to worship; and I will carry you away beyond Babylon.’

God’s privileges to Israel

7:44-50 – “There in the desert our forefather possessed the Tabernacle of witness made according to the pattern which Moses saw when God instructed him to build it. This Tabernacle was handed down to our forefathers, and they brought it here when the Gentiles were defeated under Joshua, for God drove them out as our ancestors advanced. Here it stayed until the time of David. David won the approval of God and prayed that he might find a habitation for the God of Jacob, even though it was not he but Solomon who actually built a house for him. Yet of course the most high does not live in man-made houses. As the prophet says, ‘Heaven is my throne. and earth is my footstool. What house will you build for me? says the Lord, or what is the place of my rest? Has my hand not made all these things?’

Yet Israel is blind and disobedient

7:51-53 – “You obstinate people, heathen in your thinking, heathen in the way you are listening to me now! It is always the same – you never fail to resist the Holy Spirit! Just as your fathers did so are you doing now. Can you name a single prophet whom your fathers did not persecute? They killed the men who long ago foretold the coming of the just one, and now in our own day you have become betrayers and his murderers. You are the men who have received the Law of God miraculously, by the hand of angels, and you are the men who have disobeyed it!”

The truth arouses murderous fury

7:54-55 – These words stung them to fury and they ground their teeth at him in rage. Stephen, filled through all his being with the Holy Spirit, looked steadily up into Heaven. He saw the glory of God, and Jesus himself standing at his right hand.

7:56 – “Look!” he exclaimed, “the heavens are opened and I can see the Son of Man standing at God’s right hand!”

7:57-58 – At this they put their fingers in their ears. Yelling with fury, as one man they made a rush at him and hustled him out of the city and stoned him. The witnesses of the execution flung their clothes at the feet of a young man by the name of Saul.

7:59 – So they stoned Stephen while he called upon God, and said, “Jesus, Lord, receive my spirit!”

7:60 – Then, on his knees, he cried in ringing tones, “Lord, forgive them for this sin.” And with these words he fell into the sleep of death .….

Source: J.B. Phillips translation of the Book of Acts. Click here for more.

The above painting is:

PIETRO DA CORTONA
The Stoning of St Stephen
c. 1660
Oil on canvas, 260,5 x 149 cm
The Hermitage, St. Petersburg

1700 hours: Contractions minimal all afternoon, now starting up strong again. Anne was up and around again in the afternoon, as has been her habit since the stronger contractions started. They exhibit a rather predictable rhythym. Maybe culminating in birth tonight?

Dec 26, 1230 hours update … very strong contractions again last night and this morning, and then they fade. Anne reports contractions as strong as any she has had outside the final push stage … but the birth pangs then go minimal.

It is all making me appreciate the professionalism of the birth process. And why it simply had to be done. In a pre-modernist world, when men made livable wages (or worked in the fields toiling away) and women did not have to work outside the home to support the family, women could support women in the drawn out birth process. Time was not money then, and if it took days and days to have a baby, so be it. The women folk held each other up through the process while the men folk worked away.

It was community. Not “friends,” not “immediate family,” but true community. Cousins, cousins in law, distant cousins, distant inlaws, etc and etc. The village.

Not nowadays. Nowadays time is money, and no one, man or woman, can sit around holding a pregnant gal’s hand while she goes through a lengthy birth process. Community is lost. Women chose to go to work outside the home, and then, as the economy was rotted out from the inside by free trade and other such anti-nationalist doctrines, women simply had to work. Time became money for us all. We had no room for community anymore, we became urbanites, one and all. Cosmopolitans. No time for a drawn out labor, let us get that pregnant mom to the hospital and get that baby out with the efficiency of an industrial process. Who needs natural labor? Who needs natural childbirth? Put men in charge, and it is “lights, cameras, action!!!” Wrench that kid out, or cut that kid out, and get back to the business of business in America. (C-sections have gone through the roof in the past decades – the perfect planned delivery where every minute is minimized though assembly line efficiency.)

We are slower here at the Brown homestead. Much slower. And it is boring this man to death!!!

Click here for a fine video exploring the contours of a deep sadness that the American Psychological Association and the National Abortion Federation say does not exist.

Here is their unified thought on the subject.

Post abortion psychological pain does exist, despite what quacks and hired guns may say. The American Psychological Association is a danger to both the Christian faith and Natural Law. They find nothing at all wrong with all manners of perversity, and no evidence whatsoever for post abortion syndrome. Men like the one pictured at left are simply making up their pain, evidently.

This is for those of you really and truly mourning a great loss this Christmas. (Click on the blue underscore) “Brick” was released in 1998 and made it into the top 20 on the US charts. Doubtless without the blessing of psychologists, psychiatrists and abortionists.

“Brick,”

Ben Folds Five -

6 am day after Christmas
I throw some clothes on in the dark
The smell of cold
Car seat is freezing
The world is sleeping
I am numb

Up the stairs to the apartment
She is balled up on the couch
Her mom and dad went down to Charlotte
They’re not home to find us out
And we drive
Now that I have found someone
I’m feeling more alone
Than I ever have before

She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly
Off the coast and I’m headed nowhere
She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly

They call her name at 7:30
I pace around the parking lot
Then I walk down to buy her flowers
And sell some gifts that I got
Can’t you see
It’s not me you’re dying for
Now she’s feeling more alone
Than she ever has before

She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly
Off the coast and I’m headed nowhere
She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly

As weeks went by
It showed that she was not fine
They told me son, it’s time to tell the truth

She broke down, and I broke down
Cause I was tired of lying

Driving home to her apartment
For a moment we’re alone
Yeah she’s alone
I’m alone
Now I know it

She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly
Off the coast and I’m headed nowhere
She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly

A friend of the Institute has co-authored a collection of essays that deal with this difficult topic. Here is a link to a review of that work. It is entitled Redeeming a Father’s Heart (Men Share Powerful Stories of Abortion Loss and Recovery.)

One of the chapters contains the following:

“This loss (of the couple’s unborn child) was just under the surface though at times it would surface. One of these first times was in January. On our way to an exhibition while I was driving, she started to cry. I pulled over. She said through tears, “I wanted that child.” I held her close to me. She cried on my right arm, staining the shirt with her mascara laced tears. … I did not know what to say. All I could say that it will be okay. I was being brave, but I didn’t know what to or what would happen. After all, I did not know how deeply I, too, had been cut by it all.”

Want to start toward healing? Start here for the great news that healing is available.

Here is someone to talk to at the Institute. The only healing that can truly heal begins and ends with your Creator. He can be approached only through the Blood of the Lamb.

The same author quoted above ends his essay with this encouragement:

Through my suffering and loss, I have come to see clearly how abortion, and the culture of death that surrounds it, must, and will one day be brought to an end. That answer is the conversion of hearts and minds to the truth that abortion not only ends the life of a unique unborn child, but also deeply wounds all who participate in it. With the conversion of hearts and minds to the truth that God has placed in each of our hearts, souls may be saved as lives are led in accordance with the only true purpose of this life — to know, love and serve God so as to be with Him in the next life.

The answer is not blowing in the wind. The answer is His Truth, the Faith. The answer is being His children.

Amen! Here is how you can obtain a copy of this moving book about post abortion loss in the lives of men.

Here is another link on this site about how men suffer from abortion.